Here We Go...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

We had the first Chemistry timed-trial during lecture today. It was completely horrendous, because I had a mental block and I couldn't think at all. So 45 minutes of me feeling like crap, and I handed up an almost entirely blank paper. There were 8 pages I think? I did only two sides, the first page and the last, and those pages were incomplete too. It was Bio lecture afterwards which was alright because I spent it sulking over chemistry, I was literally about to cry, because I've never left a paper that empty before. And I'm so dead because the one of the things Mr Lim absolutely hates - is when we leave the question blank - and I did that for six pages. I'm expecting Mr Lim to yell and nag and scold me but what can I possibly say? I had a mental block? He doesn't give a shit. I was unprepared + way too nervous, and that made me just completely blank. I read the questions over and over and I just didn't know what to do at all. It was pretty devastating. I was still quite frustrated about Chemistry even during PW, but PW was okay too. LKM pointed out that I have really bad eye bags and dark eye rings because I don't sleep much at all haha he's the nicest PW teacher ever. Bio consultation was cancelled because Ms Tan had an important meeting, so I left school.

I was just walking to the bus stop, with my music blasting through my earphones, and I was looking ahead but I suddenly turned my head and saw Nat sitting at the bus stop and he had this weird look on his face like "I can't believe you almost just walked past me". I like to wait at the other end of the bus stop, it's really just a habit and he said "Were you gonna walk home?" and it was my turn to stare at him in disbelief because I would never never walk home from MJ. It's quite close by bus (5 stops), but if I were to walk home... yeah no I would probably walk to the next bus stop or just collapse and die. Anyway, he told me that at the start of the year, when we were just getting to know each other, he saw me at the bus stop but he didn't actually know my name and he said "Ya lah your dp like scam only" That made me laugh like crazy because it's true, I look nothing like my display pictures, either on Twitter or Facebook. It's upsetting that he means I look a lot uglier in real life ah until he can't recognise me as Tiara but finally, an honest opinion!! 

Anyway, I got home and asked my mom if I could adopt a kitten from LY's cousin's senior (lol) but yeah she said no, because we have no space, no money, and she doesn't like the cat's face and colour hahaha. Then I showed her another picture. It's a picture of the mosque cat! And mom literally said, "I like this cat. Got the pathetic look, but not so pathetic. Macam "Jagalah aku" nye muka". I was telling her the story about how I thought this cat was pregnant, and then I said "Then the cat disappeared and tak muncul for months" and my mom went like "Muncul sey. Bahasa Melayu sey" and I laughed like crazy hahah I have the best mom ever.

sit properly

PS: I'm still not over you, and it sucks.

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